I am sure there are very few people who haven’t been affected in some way by the detrimental downpours, the ferocious fires or the distressing news of storms, suicides and stabbings. Like many people, I personally felt very saddened to hear the news about Caroline Flack, especially as I had also lost a dear friend to cancer recently and someone close to me ended up in hospital after feeling life was too much for her as well.
So how do you stay buoyant and up when you feel so heavy and down? What if you feel you are sinking into self-destruction, debt or depression? How do you cope with the emotional overwhelm, the sense of failure or loss of hope that anything will change for the better?
Obviously, things like looking at your diet, getting exercise - especially out in nature, journaling or seeking professional help goes without saying. Here are some extra thoughts to support you and get that spring back into your step:
1. “Even though this feels a pain in the a**, rest assured that this too shall pass”
Holding onto the belief that nothing stays the same for ever will give you some strength. Even the torrential rain eventually stops, the fires get put out and tears do stop!
If you are feeling particularly negative, could you ask yourself: “Is there a different belief I could have about this situation?” “What if I could choose to see this differently?” “Is what I am thinking creating pain or peace?” Your mindset is extremely powerful and can either help you get through a situation or hinder you further. Learning how to phrase your thinking and beliefs is paramount to increased energy.
2. “What others think of you is none of your business, BUT what you think of you is!”
If your situation involves other people, remember you cannot control what other people say or do. You do have control over your reactions and responses. If your self-worth is dependent on other people's opinions, acceptance or approval of you, you will never feel good enough. Maybe you could use the situation to find more self-love and self-acceptance. Remember the only approval worth receiving is what you give yourself.
3. “When you feel it, you can heal it, but wallowing is for hippos”
The worst thing you can do is try and pretend all is well, when clearly it is not. Your “Positive Pollyanna” attitude may fool others but the part of you that is not feeling that will still demand to be heard if you ignore, disassociate or bury your feelings. Emotions have a way of coming out sideways and, if you continually deny them, then you may find other family members, pets or other parts of your life will do the expressing. Unexpressed feelings have a way of manifesting themselves by sabotaging finances, health, friendships, families, career etc.
Conversely, just constantly wallowing in depression, grief or anger will have exactly the same effect AND lose you your friends!
One of the best tools I use for releasing emotions with my clients is tapping. There are lots of references on the internet detailing how to do this.
4. "Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway"
Often the terror tape you have playing of a “what if……. " scenario never comes to pass. But the thoughts and beliefs you hold can make it feel as though it already has. An exercise worth trying is to ask yourself “So what if that happened, then what?” Keep doing that several times after each possible scenario. If you keep going long enough with each scenario you should be able to discover that there is a part of you that will cope or find a new answer. It is often said that freedom lies the other side of fear. I would agree. Instead of focussing on the worst case scenario what if the best outcome happened - then what?
5. "The task before is never greater than the Power behind you"
My personal belief is that we never get given more to deal with in life than we are capable of overcoming. However, it may not feel that at the time. It is essential to realise that nothing is happening to you that is not happening for you. Every difficult and challenging situation has a way through. It is as though you have a higher part of you, helping you stretch and grow. Most issues are there to help you let go of old limiting beliefs, heal stuck emotions or support you in unfolding more of who you are.<