Do you struggle with setting boundaries for fear of confrontation or loss of approval?
Are you worried that people wont like the real you?
Do you seldom voice your true opinion or express your needs in case you are ridiculed or rejected?
You are not alone.
Trying to fit in, not rocking the boat, avoiding abandonment are just a some of the reasons many of us sacrifice our true selves because being part of the human herd is vital for our sense of self and existence.
The challenge is breaking the belief that you have to be what someone else wants you to be, in order to be accepted, loved or approved of. This is so not the truth.
“You cannot consistently be who you are not”
Eventually the worm will turn or the stress of trying to be someone else will take over either physically, emotionally, mentally and even spiritually.
May I ask you a couple of questions?
When did you decide it wasn’t safe to be you?
When did you first say yes when you really meant no?
How old were you when you lost your true voice?
These, and many other poignant questions, I support people like you, to get to the root cause of when, why or where you have lost the courage to be yourself. For many of my clients even trying to remember the last time they felt truly themselves is a vague and distant memory.
So, what can you do about it?
This is where I LOVE working with the horses. Because our horses here at the HEART Centre have been allowed to express themselves honestly and have their true voice (sadly doesn’t happen a lot in the horse world) they make superb mirrors to you or act as amazing metaphors for the challenges you may be going through.
The reason it works so well is the horses can sense when you are being in-congruent, and that makes them act in a certain way (or not!)
Did you know that every belief challenge and emotion you have carries a certain energy and vibration to it? As horses are masters at reading energy fields (their whole existence in the wild depends on it), when you are saying one thing, but your energy is saying another the horses must react to it one way or another.
Now just like people some people respond one way to you, and other people may be posed with the same scenario but respond completely differently, so too with the horses.
However, because the law of attraction is also at work getting attracted to the right horse to work with is also part of the magic.
“How does the horse know that?”
This is a frequent question my clients ask me when the horse starts doing something unexplained or licks and chews just at the precise moment, they had a poignant thought. It is a difficult question to answer without getting too scientific.
Suffice it to say it’s a bit like trying to get a magician to reveal how they do a certain trick. What I usually suggest is just let yourself be blown away and release the need to know exactly how proper equine assisted coaching and therapy works for now.
CASE STUDY
My client was working with Rosie, Bill and Billy. Normally a trio that work regularly together. However, on this particular occasion, Bill didn’t want to come in the arena with us. Now we aim to give choice where possible and as Bill was at liberty (free) he literally was free to choose to be with us or not. He continued to stay outside even though his girlfriend was with us.
My client came in feeling a bit low about something and we explored what part of her didn’t want to be involved that day (represented by Bill not wanting to join us). We continued working with the other horses, regardless.
As we explored what might have been going on, my client realised she was not feeling confident about sticking to her decisions and choices once she got home with the family. We explored what age she first felt she couldn’t be herself as a child, and when she “lost” her confident self.
As we worked at integrating that lost part of herself, Bill, who had had been roaming around on his own for over 1/2hr (which considering how dependant he normally is on his 2 friends was a mini marvel in itself) suddenly decided to come into the arena and joined the other 2 horses.
My client was blown away again by the precise timing and sequence of a horse acting out his part with more precision than an Oscar winning actor!!
There was even more this story but what I would say is instead of reading about it come and experience the magic for yourself.
Confidence to be YOU workshop: 17th/18th August 2019 .